Send in your secrets

Debby Herbenick

Debby Herbenick (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Check out this website from Indiana University, IUSecrets, where you can share your secrets by sending them to Dr. Debby Herbenick via snail mail. The postcards are then posted on the website.

From the web site

The IUSecrets project was initially started as a class assignment in Dr. Herbenick’s Human Sexuality classes. The idea was to show students that people just like them – men and women their same age, in their same community, who they sat next to each week throughout the semester – were going through very similar things (and sometimes much more difficult experiences). Since then, it has broadened to include the IU community, in partnership with the IU Health Center, during Wellness Week 2011 and 2012.”

Click here to share your secrets.

Safer sex — It’s kind of big deal

Communication can be tricky. Check out these sample conversations on how to make those “awkward” exchanges easier,  from Scarleteen.

Check out the video below for some very important tips on effective condom use.

Click here for a quiz that narrows down birth control options that might work well for you.

And here is a great idea from Sex Nerd Sandra. Come make your safer sex kit at Self Serve.



If you’re in Albuquerque and need to get tested, check out the Stanford Clinic on the University of New Mexico’s North Campus. The majority of their services are FREE. Click here for a PDF of their offered services. You can call them at 505.841.4100 or visit them at 1111 Stanford Dr. NE.



And finally, have a little fun with this Human Sexuality Map. Try it with a partner for some stimulating conversation.


Dead Dear

Through drunken additions on Facebook I recently became the acquaintance of Kai “Vanderbilt”. That’s not her actual name, but we decided on that pseudonym because of google searches or black helicopters or something, I really wasn’t paying attention. I was just picking out funny surnames. Kai works on a site called and is a transgendered person herself. We talked a lot about gender issues and a bunch of other things, because for some reason there are still issues of misunderstanding surrounding the whole community. We also talked a bit about her site and its mission.

C-Who are you as a person?

K-25, former Detroiter, graphic / web designer, glasses enthusiast

C: So, what exactly is it?

K: It’s “a place for positive trans* perspectives”, because the media is saturated in negative portrayals and negative stories about the gender transgressive community and we want to highlight what a…

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James Deen and Doc Johnson go for Deen signature toy line



James Deen partners with Doc Johnson to create a James Deen signature toy line, including a mold of his penis, which was released in September. Here is a video interview with XBIZ Associate Managing Editor Ariana Rodriguez.

Hmmmm. This is one person’s experience at the Southwest Gay and Lesbian Film Festival. I can’t say I agree, what do you think?

Adventist Voice

I attended my first gay and lesbian film festival today.  I paid my $10 and sat down in the theater to watch the documentary Seventh-Gay Adventist. 

You may be asking, “How in the world did you end up at a gay and lesbian film festival?”  If you knew me as a kid, teenager, and young adult, you would know that I have always liked girls.  Not only that, I continue to be happily married to my beautiful wife and have no desire to change gender teams.

It just happened that the pro-homosexual documentary was being screened at the Southwest Gay and Lesbian Film Festival.  How do I know the film is pro-homosexual?  Well… I attended the screening for myself today and saw the facts with my own two eyes. 

Before we were allowed to enter the theater, the attendees had to stand out in the warm New Mexico sunshine.  I…

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Study: Practicing traditional gender roles in hetero sex may lead to more risky sex, low sexual confidence

A study published in Sex Roles journal by Lisa Rosenthal from Yale University investigates how perceived “normal” gender roles impact confidence in sexual situations and safer sex practices.

The study participants were 357 women and 126 men that were all undergraduates at a Northeastern U.S. university.  They all reported being heterosexual and sexually active. The study had participants fill out a survey on their sexual confidence and sexual assertiveness. There was also a bowl of female (aka internal) condoms placed in the cubicle with a sign that read: “Protect yourself and your partner. Please take some! Free Female Condoms.”Doggy style pegging

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Sex positivity on the silver screen

English: Actress Helen Hunt at Grand Rapids in...

English: Actress Helen Hunt at Grand Rapids in 2011. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The upcoming movie, The Sessions features the relationship between Mark O’Brian and sex surrogate Cheryl Cohen-Greene. The movie is based on the life of O’Brian, who was left without the ability to move after contracting polio at age six.

The movie, which will be released in select theaters in mid to late October, shows how Cohen-Greene (Helen Hunt) helps O’Brian (John Hawkes) achieve full penetration through their work together,  which will help him in his goal to attempt to maintain romantic and sexual relationships with other people.